Lately I've been in the mood to destroy something. Something beautiful, and preferably non-living. Like burn the Louvre and wipe my ass with the Mona Lira, as my copy of Fight Club says. I don't know, man. I'm usually not that kind of guy. But lately I feel like it. I might as well enjoy it, since I've been labelled a douche for the rest of my high school career. Two months never seemed so long. In a sense I have destroyed something beautiful. I really did, if I think about it. I guess that's why I feel this way, the whole 'fuck it' attitude. I'm going to be in school for two more fucking months, then bam. Real life. I honestly think I should live as much as I can now, before life kicks in.
Adolescence is a twentieth century invention, I've heard that a lot echoing through my mind. The more I think about it, the more I realize it's true. We are a generation of men raised by women, a generation of women raised by the media. I'm still unsure if another voice in our heads is for the better. Freud's Superego has been amassing an army. To fight the moral fight of this stillyoung century. I've been debating whether or not I should just opt out, or pick a side. One thing that still gets me is my knack for picking a side unintentionally. The Id has been amassing an army as well. Set up to fight the Armageddon of the New Age. Maybe that's what all that biblical shit is about. Morals, since, the bible can be boiled down to a book of morals. A HIGHLY symbolic book of morals. You know the drill, God is in each and every one of us, blah blah blah. But once you think about it, all those hippie shit "freethinkers" have got something there. Makes me wonder if my senseless hedonism is worth it.
Then I think, "well, if the world is going to end, then fuck yeah." Still a resounding argument from the Id. While the Superego is always nagging, "get your shit together, be a good person, blah blah blah." This goes on each and every day inside me until I have a headache that could part the Red Sea.
Arm thyselves for the coming war.
And as always, happy reading.
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