Elation Desperation

Every elation has a desperation,
Ups have downs,
We have no rights left.
Life soaring through the
Breathtaking Texas sky,
Leaving me in the dust,
Dirty and alone.
Teased with the fact
That I know who I am,
And yet no one else does.
I am learning to love myself,
But the world around me
Doesn't give two shits.
Loving myself doesn't mean
Anything else loves me.

For what I've done:
I understand.
Deserve is different than
Want, and what I want
Is irrelavent.

Being happy is work,
Life is work, love is work,
And I'm just lazy.
The crippling laziness
That plagues my life
Plagues infesting my mind
Dirty and alone, loveless
And deserving of nothing more